insomnia (AGAIN!)
2.41am.
im finally going to the doctor on thursday.
this is quite a relief since ive spent most of my life crying at 2am in the morning because i cant sleep and im so tired. im tired of the day and im tired of being tired.
im tired of being awake at 2am and tired of crying.
gawwddd,, you know how tired all those being tired makes me??
im hoping it pushes through. ive been through this alllllll my life. ive been promised the appointment more than 5 times already since i had the guts to complain. ive been insomniac ever since the day i realized i have to get some sleep.
i dont know why im one, though. maybe because i think too much. maybe because im so smart. hahahaha.
maybe because im just not normal. and you cant have everything can you. this is probably the only TRUE quirk i have that i dont even have to develop. i just am.
i used to think of this as a benefit. i mean, i get to have 20 hours of working time instead of the usual 16 hours that normal people have. but take it this way: normal people have 16hours of awakeness, good memory, high energy, and dandyness while i get 20 hours of unproductivity, crankiness, and eyebags i'll never be able to get rid off. i mean, these undereye baggage are already 18 years in the making. i cant expect them to go away in a month.
grabe. im tired. pero i dont want to sleep with swollen eyes. i just have to sulk a little more until my eyes turn normal. otherwise, i have to suffer 20hours of an uneven pair of eyes. (thats what happen when i sleep after i just cried. stupid decision.)
posted by the irresistably conceited Jenni |
