IM BACK!!!
for the past few days, ive been attempting to write decent posts for this blog, but to no avail, i am very unlucy with it. its either im barely inspored, do not have anything to write, am PRESSURED to write to the point that writing is useless, or i write with the most intense passion then i have to keep it private because things get a little too personal.
yup it does happen. there really is such a thing as too personal.
im sorry to disappoint my avid readers, especially the regular lurks whose names i do not know, and only god knows how useless you think of me.
aside from that, i havent been posting pictures too much.
that is soo bound to get this blog so boring. but im not really a picture posting girl, so oh well, you just have to appreciate the words and bore your dear selves to death.
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ive been meaning for the longest time to write about that debut. but the thing is, i dont know what to make up about it yet. as usual, i expected too much at the wrongest aspects. personally, I NOW THINK i wasnt the prettiest belle that night. my makeup really was SOOO good, but when the nose area started to melt, every pic made me look like a really ugly debutante whom all have loved because she has "personality".
fuck personality. you need the looks to get with it. and without powedering my nose, i dont have any looks to speak of.
ive already ranted about the latecomers that im this close to accepting the fact that shit like that happen. and the rain too. uh-huh. the finance is okay.
BUT THE NON-MAKEUP ON MY NOSE IS JUST THE WORSE! :(
ive ranted on the previous entry on how unphotogenic i am. amp! i do know that im pretty in REAL LIFE, or maybe i just wont bare it that THAT'S REALLY HOW I LOOK LIKE. you see, IF that's how i really look like, then i dont deserve anything or anyone at all, i deserve to be a friendless dumbass hag with a unibrow and am in the making mustache.
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butttt the debut is fun nonetheless. i mean, I COULD HAVE IT BETTER, no doubt about it. and as much as my heart bleeds to say this, it may just be one of if not THE best debut ive ever seen in my life. i mean, ive been to less than (a small amount of number i will not share) in my life, and this is by far the best.
its all just me. i expect too much. from everything. from me, from others, from god,.. and even from the fucking weather.
nonetheless, the place looked sureal (unlike me)
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stress level is high and everyone firmly believes that stress is getting the best of them. and just like any belief, THINKING ABOUT IT MAKES IT TRUE. ive read something significant about what i just said somewhere, i just cant put my hands on it.
"if you believe in something, and think and act according to that belief, then you are already aligning the universe for it to happen."- The Secret, Rhonda Byrne
you see, that is the general rule of attraction. thinkin good. as i ALWAYS SAY you are what you firmly believe in, and that is one of the reasons why im mostly always honest. because i want to be honest to myself, and when i feel safe sharing something to someone, it means its not that bad.
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posted by the irresistably conceited Jenni |
