brain
one of my greatest frustrations in life (yes, as in life talaga!) is not having enough opportunity to sport my clothes. i mean, really! ive only worn an item twice or thrice then it becomes too last season! ughhh.. thats just so unfair! :( so thursdays and saturdays must now mean i have to go out somewhere just for the saking of dressing myself up or down. dressing down is a much greater feat, btw.
im starting to think im doing more than quite well in this whole fashion fasting business. especially since i know what im saving up for, and because i have THAT MUCH SELF DISCIPLINE to say no to stuff which i know i dont really need in the first place. well, i barely buy stuff that i ever hate afterwards. blame it or credit it to my 'good taste' or so i (as in i alone!) call it.
the only indulging ive done for a while is that tiara or 'crown' as i call it from the princess place in bonifacio high st. ive already got one in BETTER material actually, but this one is so much fun! a notch much fun-er than the more expensive one. its all plastic and kiddy and "fun". im currently loving it to the bones.
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yep, i have bangs now. fringe, bangs, whatevs.
well, like 5 days ago and its becoming very tricky. para ciang lalaki! sometimes its nice to me, sometimes its like a bitch! who wont it fucking cooperate with my hair! hayyy... my hair's still "paffy". my goodness! how does one fix that puffyness.. aside from having ones hair thinned out. pretty risky for me. no haircuts (not even bangs) until september! the fasting thing's going pretty well.. so well, wala lang.
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and lastly there's this personal issue im going through. i was quite shocked when i FINALLY realized im in fine arts. ohmyfuckinggod! im in fine fucking arts!
me, macci, the one whom people bet would be a good lawyer, awesome writer, hit journalist, influential archi, ceo bitch turns out to be an artist after all. i mean whats the big fuss about this fine arts thing. why do people keep on thinking they're fucking too good for "drawing"!
aaaahhh!! putangina. why why why why!!???
ang hangin naman ng dating ko! shet naman! first and foremost, advertising arts is not all about "drawing". a pretty much big fraction of the cfad population sucks at drawing but managed anyhoos because its the ideas that count. and the ideas are the hard part!
one must be a "dreamer" and not a "realist". its about thinking out of that so-called box. its about being inspired 24/7, and having to experience any emotion to get that inspiration, be it love, passion, fear and even disgust. the ideas are the heart of the business.
but still, im not going to be the attorney they all wanted me to be. im not going to send people to jail or to their deaths. im not going to save the guilty from his punishment. im not going to meddle in any senatorial or even capitol affairs, im not going to inherit the construction business, im not going to write a book about any matter. and im fucking not going to publish any form of political issue in any newspaper.
im going to have my self published or employed in a fashion magazine and isolate myself from the real world, just as every fashion authority is! we are not the business people, we are merely the heart of the business.
eew. i hate being the heart, id rather be the brain!
posted by the irresistably conceited Jenni |
