bull.
how i wish i get paid for writing all these bullshit. that would make me so stinking rich i wouldnt have to get off my ass ever in life.
im weirded out this past few days. i've been crying my eyes out for reasons that are well, resonable, but i just cant say it outloud. what the fuck has happened to me? to everyone? why cant i just say it?? becasue im a pretentious bitch and im dying because of it.
ive been crying, and that's soooo not me. i never cry. i have the heart of, i dunno, a rock??? welll, i cant even go to sleep. and the only way for me to sleep properly is cry until my eyes get tired and all i can do is close it.
im troubled. fucking troubled. and ive been hiding it for too long. i dont want to go wearing the emotions, fears, worries, and the problems on my sleeves. i just want to keep it inside until it self-terminate.
everyday, i laugh and make jokes but barely talk to anyone anymore. ive been like this for a looong time na. noone sees it, and sometimes i forget it. but when i get home, hahahaha, i thought i've already ran away from it, but surprise surprise! i haven't. i want to leave highschool behind. all the secrets and plastican and hatred. angst, pare... stupid angst. ha.
bull. hahaha. yeah, bull.
posted by the irresistably conceited Jenni |
